Wild Russia

I I'm watching wild russia on planet green it makes you want to jump in the tv and take in all of the beauty and wonder of the different parts of the world......simply beautiful

"Untitled page"

I've come to the conclusion that you are my drug and I the fean that itches and scratches for your presents. You make me smile just thinking of you, you tuck me in and chase away the monsters with the thought of seeing you the next day. dreams full like clouds, bursting of wishes and wants of you. over flowing my head of girlish non since that reminds me of playgrounds after school, sharing my last animal crackers with you.

My symbol of sharing a little piece of my heart, my soul, my life with you. Never knowing that there was another. Another that bit the head off the animal crackers first before eating the rest. Another that fought the same battles that life seemed to fish out. Though knowing your dislike for my like, water the sign of life, yet only to love the fire in you,the sign of destruction. Opposite truly attract.

"I" going from hating the path i walked. Only to walk a new one that now I thank life for torchering,beating,and kicking me down even when i was already down from the old path. Because with out the blood and dirt infested tears I leaked. I would never have met you and i thank life for that not a day nor moment earlyer.

For i wouldn't of been able as i am now to share the tourch that lights our pathway to the finish line. Love makes me right and so i write.

The Scent Of Dreams....

My life is mostly of light,filling it, doors open SLAM!
The ringing in my ears, as i hang my head off my bed WHISPERS!
Going through my dreams, stares creek VOICES!

How i desire your dreams dark with lollipops of poison gumdrops.
Paintings of dark clouds, black rainbows and red raindrops of sacrifice.
Like a calm feline, with a body of love and queens eyes of protection in my black heart.
Yes ruthless and witty, sounds of hissing and clawing its way free of my bloody fantasy's,
Waiting for my dreams to end.........

The lightness of my world but the darkness of my dreams
With the songs of my shadows clinging free.
I am sleeping here now....
Things i am but not of wishes.
We act as homo sapiens do trying to walk up right.
Praying that we will sprout white wings instead of black bricks.

But at the end of our desperate - C.
We break of bat wings and color them white.
With the blood of our enemies,
And fly up to the path where the King shall crown us "SAINT"

NOW...

Wake Up!

See the world you call home
And begin to weep.........

I apologies for my imagination...

.i feel as if im stairing at a double sided mirror...can you tell me plz which side is realer..i thought your lies were only to deceive me..now i see..your lies are the very foundation your life rest on... Now i get it..and im sorry...who new it would take a lier to wake me from my dreams... She use to lie not cuz she cud cuz she was looking in a double sided mirror... Couldnt tell which side was reality or imaginary...so she blames herself...yet she doesnt blame the ablitity to tell stories...she blames her lack of skill in separating the sent of dreams land from reality... Now she is not mentally chanlenged she only lacked the skill cuz she never wanted to learn the skill...in fear that the reality was too strong for a weak minded yet strong willed girl who feared change...and feared being alone... So this girl is sorry for any people she has hurt in the past wit her imagination... But i wont say sorry for the extent of my imagination only for my lack of control over it sometime....this is all this girl has to say about that for now...so take it and leave it in the past... Thu our past developes the future in most cases..it doesnt have to rule it...

Now feel free to coment...but if you dont understand it then this is not ment for u....

Do you know why the Moon is lonely ?

Because She had a lover.

His name was Quae Carcajou and they lived in a spirit world together.
And every night they would wander the skies together.
But one of the Spirits was jealous. Trickster wanted the Moon for himself.
So he told Quae Carcajou that the Moon had asked for flowers. He told him to come to our world and pick her some wild roses.

But Quae Carcajou didn’t know that once you leave the spirit world, you can never come back.
And every night, He looks up in the sky and sees the Moon and howls Her name.
But, He can never touch Her again........

'Just More Thoughts Of Mine'

So you asked me once when i said 'I Love You' what did that mean..I am not always good at explaining myself to you because truthfully u make me nervous ....i'm only nervous because i'm hoping that what ever i tell you ...you wont push it back at me .....i know you wont but.. i been thinking of this alot and had to get this out my mind before i forget it all... 'I love you' means that I accept you for the person that you are, and that I do not wish to change you in anyway. It means that I will love you and stand by you even through the worst of times. .....It means loving you when your in a bad mood or too tired to do things i want to do. It means loving you when your down, not just when your fun to be around.' I love you' means that I know your deepest secrets and do not judge you for them, asking in return only that you do not judge me for mine. it means that I care enough to fight for what we have and that I love you enough not to let you go. It means thinking of you, dreaming of you, wanting and needing you constantly, hoping you feel the same way for me.......

Letters To My Next Generation

To my unborn Generation, 

I love you and always will I know I’m difficult most time. But I will always try my best for you. So should you for others, I want you to grow up and live your life fun and safely. Take care of each other don’t let fights break any family traditions. Be a family and stay close. If you mess up, own up to it and move on learn from it don’t stay on it. Love yourself to the fullest give everything to your next generation and more. Push forward never slack; Take care of your responsibilities. be a true warrior Like I am. Know that every battle is not to be fought. Be strong mentally, physically, and spiritually. Everyone makes mistakes forgive them for it. Travel; don’t wait to do what you love. Don’t be afraid to stop and breathe the air and ask the questions of where it comes from. Sit in a park alone sometimes and just wonder about the world. Show your love the first time and don’t regret it. Love will be a hard thing to grip and let go of. Don’t let it ruin you. You are one of a kind, show it. I will always be with you and believe in your dreams and you. Don’t cry too much, you will forget how to smile. Don’t laugh too much; you will forget what you should protect yourself from. 

Trust in yourself and the few selected ones you choose. Don’t sit down too much dance and make a fool of yourself, you will build character. Take the necessary chances. Follow your heart not your wants (all the times). Don’t ever be ashamed of yourself; you have come from an long strong line of warriors. Soft spoken is sometimes needed. Listen to the young they have knowledge too. Learn as much as you can ask questions about everything. Respect the dead and the living; they build the path in which you stand on. Love and care for others you know and who you don’t. Don’t fear change if it weren’t for change you wouldn’t be here. Don’t wait till others are gone to say you love them and cared about them. Remember you are not bigger than the ocean, so don’t act like it. We all have hoped for better days at one point in our lives. But live the days that are yours and don’t concern yourself with others green grass. You are a great person that will do great things and more in your future, near and far. Never give up on anything you wish to do or to get done. Be loyal and true to all that deserve it. Yet kind and understanding to the once that you feel don’t deserve it.

~Just More Thoughts, Late At Night~

The Real Collector

 My name is the collector,  

I live next door to you... i look like you and i talk like all of you...

I was born not in a test tube but a woun...my mothers woun...

my heart beats and i breath normaly...i grew at the same rate you did...

I plaied in the same sand box you did...i ate the cold lunches like you...

and i have the same basic body functions you do...my blood is warm...

and i shiver when its cold and sweat when its hot...i love and i fall in love...

I hate and i hold grudes...i cry when im sad or hurt...i lauph when im happy or amused...

I know right from wrong and good from bad...i protect and fight wen needed...

Im not perfect jst like you...i make spelling, math,word useage,and mis judging mistakes like you...

I do all of this like you do...but unlike you...i  need practice in doing all of this...

Its not natural to  me...it never will be....tho i was born in a woun...

i came out to early for my time...Whiile i developed on the outside like you ...

on the inside my thought, body,and memories...is older than my birth date...

when you studied for exames i studied you...when you ate i studied you ...

when you laphed i studied you...i became an expert at being a human...

and seperating and confusing and dealing wit the emotions you carry...

why do i do this you ask me...because i am a collector..

inorder to collect you must become what you collect...

so you know their in's and out's...their weakness and strenghths...

if you know none of this then how can you call yourself a collector...There are more of us...

we go undetected because of our special skills in blending...that is our power...

we blend and we stick out all at the same time...but dont get us confused...

we are not supernaural beings...

we are legends not myths...we are not a foketail u read in books and on the internet...we are your history...

on the outside...but on the end the past is like lightening and it hasnt slowed...